Seasonal Self-Care: Tips for Relieving Stress and Navigating Difficult Food Situations During the Holiday Season
This post was written by Jessica Malone, a dietetic intern at UCSD. Jessica has a Masters Degree in Nutrition for Wellness from Bastyr University and is currently completing her dietetic internship in order to become a registered dietitian. She enjoys horseback riding, ice hockey, and strength training, but after sustaining one too many shoulder injuries, she has come to the realization that slowing down with gentler nutrition and exercise practices is a much better road to body health and emotional wellbeing. She hopes to teach these lessons to her own clients some day. Reviewed and edited by Claire Dean, MPH RDN.
As the holiday season approaches, so do the promise of festive delights and joyous gatherings with friends and family. Many love this time of year for its emphasis on celebration and indulgence. However, for those working towards a better relationship with food, the holidays can bring an added layer of stress and anxiety. Between the abundance of food and the pressure of the social setting, it can be easy to forget to be kind and compassionate to yourself. In this article, we offer some mindful approaches aimed at navigating the nuances of food and related challenges that can help harmonize mental wellbeing and festive celebration.
Determine a Personal Focus for the Celebration
Setting goals can be helpful for grounding and preparation. It may sound strange to set an intentional focus or “goal” for the holidays, but it can help prevent stress and anxiety around a holiday gathering by giving you something new to work towards. Pick something small and tangible for you. Maybe it’s setting a focus on enjoying time with a specific friend or family member that you don’t see very often. Maybe practicing a specific distress tolerance skill around unpredictable food scenarios. Or maybe, it’s attending one or two social gatherings this year when you would normally avoid them all. It can be anything that is meaningful to you.
Set Gentle Social Boundaries
You might dread the holiday season because it means having to spend time around family or friends that will make comments on bodies, appearances, eating habits, relationships, or even job status. In order to address this, one approach is to have some conversation re-directs ready ahead of time. This could sound like:
I’d rather not talk about my diet. Tell me about your recent travels or any interesting hobbies you've picked up since I’ve last seen you!
I’m trying to focus less about my body and what I eat. How about we chat about any tv shows or movies you’ve recently discovered?
Thank you for your concern, but I’ve got this handled. Have you read/seen/tried anything new recently that surprised you?
These types of statements are useful because they redirect conversation to more neutral topics. These statements can also be sent to friends or family members ahead of an event, either by yourself or by a trusted ally, in order to prevent these situations in the first place. You can also excuse yourself from a conversation and step outside for some fresh air or into a quiet room if you need some time to regroup.
Create Self-Care Rituals
Any stressful event is deserving of self-care practices, be it a deadline, presentation, or holiday celebration. It can be anything that brings you joy and helps you to feel calmer, more present, and centered. The point is to help you down-regulate your central nervous system to get out of “fight or flight” mode. Take a walk, sit and meditate, journal, do some yoga or deep breathing prior to the social gathering. This will help you remain more resilient to distressing situations that might arise at a holiday gathering. Plan another type of stress-relieving or joy-bringing activity for afterwards, like a self-care night of your favorite tv show. These practices not only help you get through a stressful social gathering, but they also help you practice using skills to manage stress and anxiety as they arise.
Use Intuitive Eating Principles
Incorporating Intuitive Eating principles can be a powerful tool in navigating holiday stress around food and social gatherings. By honing into your body's cues, embracing a non-restrictive mindset, and finding ways to enjoy food and company, Intuitive Eating encourages a sense of balance and empowers you to prioritize your wellbeing. Here are a few specific principles to consider during your holiday gatherings.
Honor your Hunger: You might feel pressured to diet or restrict food intake in anticipation of the big meal. However, dieting and restricting food deprives your body of adequate energy and nutrients that it needs consistently in order to regulate hunger appropriately. This means that you’re more likely to over-eat to uncomfortable fullness at a social event as excessive hunger takes over. Practice listening to your biological sense of hunger and feed yourself regularly throughout the day so that you can be present and enjoy the day without being preoccupied by hunger.
Feel your Fullness: At the same time, you can also learn to respect your biological sense of fullness. By slowing down, savoring each bite, and tuning in to body sensations, you can become more aware of your sensations of fullness and develop more trust in your body to stop when you are satisfied. But remember that it’s also okay and normal to eat past comfortable fullness on a day of celebration like Thanksgiving. If this happens, know that the feeling will pass and your body knows what to do.
Make Peace with Food: Practice unconditional permission to eat this holiday season. Depriving yourself of the foods you love often results in a lack of food satisfaction that leads to massive cravings, and can result in binging and feelings of guilt (remember the diet cycle). Instead of engaging with this cycle, make peace with the reality that there are no good or bad foods, and give yourself permission to enjoy the foods you truly want to eat.
Discover the Satisfaction Factor: You deserve to eat and enjoy satisfying foods. Think about what makes eating satisfying for you, whether it be tasting new foods, having special occasion foods, eating with loved ones, or marveling at the festive decor or music. When we freely allow ourselves to enjoy, we build a positive experience that leaves us more satisfied. This can be a powerful tool in helping you feel more content and trusting of yourself around eating.
By setting intentions, honoring boundaries, practicing self-care, and embracing some Intuitive Eating principles, you can foster a positive relationship with food and your body. A sense of personal balance allows you to navigate holiday gatherings and lessen stress. We encourage you to savor the time with family and friends and to prioritize you and your needs during your holiday celebrations this year.